How to Enjoy First Date with a Japanese Girl | Guidable - Your Guide to a Sustainable, Wellbeing-centred Life in Japan

How to Enjoy First Date with a Japanese Girl

By Guidable Writers Apr 29, 2017

Japanese girls are known to be shy and rather quiet. How do Japanese enjoy their first date?

If you are going on a date with a Japanese girl, how can you entertain the time with her?

Here are some tips for you.

Avoid Too Much Body Contact

Body Contact is one of the good ways you two get closer, but it’s rather risky on the very first date. Maybe you want to show your feelings by plenty of body contact, but if you want to build a serious relationship, take it slow and be patient. It’s better to show her only limited body contact on a first date to avoid unnecessary misunderstandings. Girls get careful sometimes to protect themselves from unfaithful guys. Japanese girls may show extra vigilance to non-Japanese guys also though it sounds unfair. I respectively have to say we find many non-Japanese guys just playing around in Japan, so this has made girls protective to herself. BUT it’s a chance for you in a way. Let’s turn it into opportunity!

 It’s not a problem to give her natural contact. For example, when going through crowds, you can take her hand and lead her not to get lost. You could also naturally pull her close in such situation, But not for the entire time. The most important thing is to do these action naturally.

 At the end of a successful first date, you might want to hug or kiss her. Did she look happy through the entire time? Japanese girls sometimes give you “just being nice” smiles even if she didn’t feel the date was fun. So be careful. It may confuse you, but her body languages cannot tell a lie. You can judge if she already likes you by her body language and attitude.

 If she looks happy and has a lingering eye contact, she might be ready at least for a hug, but you should wait for a kiss till more dates to go on. We don’t have a habit of greeting hugs or kiss in Japan, so they have special meanings.

Be Punctual

Don’t be late for the date. Japan is one of the punctual countries, so we don’t get used to have waited. Being on time is ok, but arriving at least 5 minutes in advance and smiles her a welcome makes her feel that she is special to you. Trains and buses can get delayed by traffic jam or accidents, so plan extra time. Don’t sleep over at least, or run out of the house with mismatched shoes on!

 Don’t Dominate the Conversation

I guess the more you are into her, the more you want to talk about yourself and show good things to her. However, does that really amuse her? Of course she is interested in knowing who you are and what you like etc but, you should not take over the conversation. Let her talk also so that you also get to know her, and she will feel you are interested in knowing her too by your listening attitude.

Be Gentle yet Strong and Protective

Lately guys in Japan are getting neutral that many of them aren’t even interested in romance. Many Japanese girls are not satisfied with those guys. She will be attracted by your smart escort treating her good and leading her. We don’t have a lady-first manner, so you don’t have to worry about this. However, even she doesn’t take it for granted, she will feel good and appreciate it very much if you treat her like a lady. 

You will also find many Japanese guys carrying a ladies’ bag. You would feel weird, but it’s common boyfriend carries his girlfriend’s bag and stuffs here. So if your date has a lot to carry, help her with the stuff. Pay attention to her outfit also: She’s dressed up for you! If she is wearing a high-heel, walk slowly and take breaks once in a while so she won’t become tired.


In the end, first date is an opportunity for both of you to know each other well. I wrote things to pay attention on a first date, but being yourself and try to enjoy the date yourself is the most important. If you are acting somebody else, the relationship won’t last long. I wish you good luck to your first date!